Are you buying into the lie of throw-away relationships?
Let’s set the record straight.
Hey Friend! The other day my young-adult daughter and I were excited to have some girl-time and watch a good ol’ chick flick together. We were looking for a love story, laughter, and warm fuzzies. We got 70% of that with the movie we chose and the other 30% was just garbage.
That 30% garbage has really been bugging me. I’m just so sick of the garbage in mainstream media. How about you?
I’m tired of being bombarded by lies about marriage, morality, and sex. Not only am I tired of it, I’m worried about how the prolific stream of lies are indoctrinating our children and poisoning our culture.
The movie with my daughter the other night is just one instance of a series of lies that I see being told again and again and I’m calling these lies out right here and now and setting the record straight.
These lies grow bigger and bolder on prime time television every single year. This article shows how we’ve gone from I Love Lucy to Sex in the City. And it was written in 1997 and it’s so much worse now.
We see these lies celebrated in current events when lawmakers and bystanders cheered in New York when new abortion laws made it even easier to abort a late-term baby.
These lies are pervasive in popular movies, books, songs, games, all over the internet, and even in what kids are learning at school with comprehensive sexuality education.
You know what lies am I talking about, right? The lies that say throw-away relationships bring happiness. For example, have you heard any of these lies lately?
- Easy sex, one night stands, and temporary relationships are normal, exciting, and romantic.
- Casual sex is normal, healthy teenage behavior.
- Jokes and casual conversation about sex are funny and you should lighten up a little if that offends you.
- Long term marriage commitment is out of reach and out of style.
- You can easily and happily change out casual romantic partners like you can change cars – trading for a new model when the old one gets dented or loses the excitement of being “new”.
- Human babies, a natural consequence of all this easy sex are just as easily thrown out with the trash with on-demand abortions. You and your partner have a choice if you happen to get pregnant.
- Liberated women don’t need men – except for sperm donation. They and their best friends can raise a healthy, happy child. Who needs a man? They don’t.
- Men don’t need to be weighed down with a family. No one really expects them to stay around anyway. And no one will miss them if they’re gone.
- Don’t waste your best years in childbearing. Wait to have children until you’ve had your career, traveled, and accomplished your dreams. Then, have a kid or two if you want.
- The daycare can raise your children just fine. You have more important things to do than be stuck at home changing diapers and wiping noses.
- Fathers, and mothers, husbands and wives, children, and babies are all expendable.
Our western popular culture says all of this is OK. Celebrates it. Promotes it. Normalizes it because “my truth is different from your truth”.
You do you.
Live and let live.
You only live once.
I’m here to say that it’s all lies. It’s all just a false ideology created and perpetuated by giant corporations, lobbyists, groups of people motivated by money, and ultimately the Destroyer of families. It’s an orchestrated agenda designed by the adversary to ruin the family. But the family can’t be ruined.
We can only ruin ourselves by neglecting true principles governing family.
The family entity is eternal.
The truth is that true joy and happiness comes from connection in loving, committed families with a mother and a father. This is the ideal.
When the ideal family situation is disrupted – whether from choice or life events out of our control such as death or separation – real heartache and broken-ness comes from neglected, absent, and broken relationships.
The media’s portrayal of easy love, casual family, and temporary relationships isn’t real, with real people that are finding real joy.
Why do we allow this portrayal to be pushed upon us without a fight? Why do we pay for and watch movies that promote this lifestyle as happiness? Why as a culture are we supporting this false portrayal? Why do we accept this as satisfying entertainment? Why do we let these misleading messages enter our homes and schools like a welcomed guest?
The truth is:
When fathers and mothers leave their families, there is heartbreak and a broken-ness that never fully repairs. Children are resilient, but this break affects them the rest of their lives.
When young people experiment with sex without the maturity to take on the massive enormity of that transcendent relationship, souls are hurt and calluses grow over the wounds. Their view of and experience with sex is altered into a casual counterfeit and hollow shell of human intimacy.
When people throw each other away hearts are scarred.
When mothers and fathers abort their babies, there is no relief of the grief.
When these relationships are cut off, thrown away, discarded, and absent, there is a crack in our wholeness. There is shame, hurt, resentment, pain.
When these ties are broken and missing we all suffer.
What brings wholeness?
Wholeness, on the other hand, comes from connection. Committed, enduring, loving relationships with our people that we are tied to through marriage, blood, birth, and sacrifice for one another. It is being known, cared for, united, and bound to each other. These relationships can’t be replaced.
Although our family relationships aren’t and never will be perfect, when families base their interactions on the teachings of Jesus Christ and are bound in committed loving relationships, these relationships supersede the difficulties and help the members of that family overcome the hardships.
Family doesn’t have to be perfect. Just present. Committed. Enduring. Loving. Loyal.
We must fight against the tide that normalizes the lies. We do this by celebrating and promoting family and the joy that comes from real, long-term, committed relationships. It’s the source of real happiness in the real homes in the world. Not the fake ideology of throw-away relationships that the media portrays.
Let’s teach our children fearlessly the sanctity of life, marriage, fidelity, chastity, and virtue.
Let’s show how heroic it is to express love and respect, sacrifice for others, and build strong families.
Let’s be bold about the power that is found in keeping promises, bridling passions, and keeping commitments.
Let’s share the joy found in connection with YOUR PEOPLE and in living your life for and with them.
Pop culture media spreads the lie of throw-away relationships.
Let’s spread the truth:
Celebrate the truth!
To celebrate these truths I’m sharing three of my favorite resources to illustrate them. I hope you’ll celebrate by sharing your favorite resources and stories in the comments below:
This video shows what joy in a loving, committed marriage means, even when life gets hard. This is such a beautiful example of relationship goals.
One of our family’s favorite TV shows is Relative Race. We are watching season five right now and it is soooo clear and apparent the importance of family. That we are not whole until we have connection with those in our family. That fathers matter. That mothers matter. That we need each other. Warning: watch with tissues nearby 🙂
This short video puts everything in perspective! Family is really where peace, joy, happiness, and love is at.
So my Friend, what do you think? Do you see these lies in pop culture and media? How do you feel about it? How has connection in your family through long-term committed relationships brought you joy and happiness? I’d love to hear your celebrations of family too. Please leave a comment below!!! Come on, don’t be shy 🙂 I would love to hear from YOU.
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YES! Please send me the FREE Family Mission Statement Workbook.
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I LOVE this LaRayne! Oh, you hit the nail on the head and have struck a chord in my heart. Family is the best. The absolute best. Thank you for your courage to say it straight and like it truly is.
Hey Myra! Thanks for taking time to reply here! It can be scary to share our opinions when they go against mainstream media. But I believe most people are good and know in their hearts what is good and really want just what is good. Mainstream doesn’t represent most of us – they just are loud in their minority 🙂
100% agree. You have a gift with words and explaining your thoughts. I find it hard to even find wholesome movies or TV shows to watch alone, or with my family. They have what you talked about, along with normalizing violence and crimes. It’s no wonder people are confused, and act out from what Hollywood portrays as good, fun and normal.
Hey there Sherrie! Thanks so much for your kind words! And you are not kidding – there is A LOT of confusion out there. This is why when I read a good book or see a good movie I like to support it by buying it and telling others about it.Good companies that are making good media need our support, and we help each other by getting the word out about good things we can watch or read to help us rake through the muck and get to the good stuff.
Beautifully said and AMEN my friend! The world is so in our face about these lies, we must be just as bold in teaching what is TRUE, and will bring us the true joy and happiness that can only come through following Jesus Christ.
Hi Noele! It’s so good to hear from you 🙂 It takes courage to stand up for truth but if enough of us do it we can really make a difference. There is great hope for goodness to prevail. Thanks for your comment my Friend!