How I Got Past Past Panic

We took our kayaks out of the water just as the sun was setting. After driving four hours to get to Sand Hollow Reservoir and kayaking a few more hours, we were tired.

 

It was getting dark fast.

 

We were wet because the wind kicked up late in the afternoon and we paddled through white caps that splashed into our kayaks and all over us. We were cold and our fingers felt frozen in the November night chill.

 

The last motor boat was hauled up the boat ramp, loaded onto its trailer, and disappeared down the road. Everyone else was gone now.

 

Except us.

 

All of this would have been fine except we couldn’t get the kayaks secured on top of my car.

 

Des and I had previously experienced what can happen if the kayaks aren’t secure when we about lost one while speeding down the freeway on our way to Payson Lakes a few weeks earlier (you can read about that here). We didn’t want a rerun of that!

 

The problem was that the last set of J hooks holding one of the kayaks wouldn’t screw tight to the bars on my car. We tightened it until there was no more thread on the screws but the hooks still wobbled precariously on the bar. We knew we couldn’t use them. 

 

We decided to tie both kayaks flat on the roof of the car. It seemed simple enough.

 

Nothing was working right.

But, I had never carried them both that way before and I was really new to strapping anything onto anything, let alone 55 pound kayaks to the roof of a car.

 

With numb fingers we got the first kayak tied down, but it was loose even after tightening the straps as far as we could. While working on the second kayak the first one slid off the car, scratching the passenger door (sorry Honey!!!) and landing with a crash on the ground. 

 

By this time we were alone next to a black lake and the sun was down.

 

We finally got both kayaks on and strapped but they both were loose no matter how we tried tightening the straps and configuring the knots. We were racing the darkness. I tried everything I could think of.

 

I could feel my natural tendency to panic start to creep into my heart.

 

It took self control to stay calm and keep trying to think through the problem and find a solution. Even though Des was there I felt responsible for making it work since they were my kayaks and my car. 

 

Doubtful thoughts crowded my mind and heart, like, “What in the world do you think you are, some Super Outdoor Woman? You don’t know what you’re doing. Why did you think you could manage these kayaks out on your own? And now what are you going to do?”

 

I didn’t know what to do.

Then I had an idea.

Then, suddenly, I knew exactly what I needed to do.

 

I turned to Des and said, “I think….we need to….pray.”

 

So we bowed our heads next to each other in the dark and cold and I said a humble prayer of gratitude and a plea for help. I thanked God for the exquisite beauty he created that we were able to kayak in it all day safely. Then I explained our problem with the kayaks and our worry of being stuck in the dark. I asked if he would help us to feel his peace, to be able to think clearly, and find a solution.

 

We then got back to work on the kayaks.

 

I felt a clarity of mind and a calmness that I didn’t have before.

 

One of us had an idea of a new, different way to tie the straps. And it worked! It only took that one more try to get them secure and we were safely on our way.

 

I was so relieved and grateful!

 

It was a good reminder for me that when I am

in the dark

scared

doubting myself

out of answers

stuck in a problem

in need of help

 

….remember to pray!

As a side note, we did realize later that we could have just left the kayaks there and come back for them in the morning. Our hotel was only about a half hour away. Although that would have been the last thing we wanted to do. We weren’t truly in any real danger. But it was a good test of our resilience and faith. It built my confidence in myself and in God. Even in something as seemingly insignificant as tying down kayaks He was there for me. I’m never alone.

 

Now, I’d love to hear from you.

What times in your life have you felt alone, scared, and out-of-answers and help came through prayer? When have you felt close to panic and received help?

 

Leave a comment at the end of this post.

 

I’d love for you to share your story here! What you have to say may be just the thing someone else needs to be inspired today.

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